Monday, February 13, 2006
I am really, furiously angry right now. I honestly can't remember the last time I felt the emotion of anger. It usually really takes a lot to get me angry. I let a lot slide and despite being stressed out a lot I find it hard to get angry at things or people.
So I took everyone's advice and wore what I wanted to the club since I am supposed to not care what other people think there. I decided to actually bother using my myspace page for more than viewing other people's information so I went searching for a theme that I liked the look of. I finally found one that I liked and had a good balance of femininity and pattern to it and I really liked the pattern on it. I don't even usually like pink but the shades it had were aesthetically pleasing to me. Then in one of my random moments of inspired thought I came up with the sentence "don't get lost in the rainbow" thinking of it in some fantasy, wizard of oz like context. I got a comment from my brother that said "wow yeah that was a random thought" and a message from him that said "definatly interesting but definatly you, but your page isn't plain at all anymore so thats good." On the other hand, Jeremy said that erik's reaction was "erik was shocked as hll. i think between that and the comment he was kinda scared" and "i hink that he is getting more and more conviced that your gay" and given some of the things erik has said in the past, I have no reason to believe Jeremy was lying or even exaggerating in this case.
In the past, my brother has gotten all upset when I would hide things from him to protect him and gone on and on about how we are brothers and we should be able to tell each other things. Jeremy says I should just blow it off as the ramblings of a drunken person, but I think in vino veritas. If he had a problem with it or a question about it, then he should have said something about it rather than leading me to believe there is nothing wrong.
If you have a problem with me, DON'T FUCKING LIE TO ME ABOUT IT. I only respect people that I can trust to be frank with me even if they don't agree with me or approve of me. So, if anyone has anything to say, out with it.